


Working Week, Sunday Rest

by grumpyphoenix



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Grief/Mourning, Homophobic Language, Loss/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Major Character Death, Multi, OT3, Polyamory, Space Husbands, old married spirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-25
Updated: 2015-11-25
Packaged: 2018-05-03 09:37:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5285786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grumpyphoenix/pseuds/grumpyphoenix
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the loss of Leonard McCoy, Kirk and Spock grieve together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Working Week, Sunday Rest

**Author's Note:**

> HUGE thanks to Fandomlucky for last minute Beta-ing.  
> First Spirk story that ever left the confines of my head, and poly marriages are on my mind.

Blue light begins to filter through the windows, and Spock rises from the bed. He had not been asleep, having determined long ago that he was destined for insomnia; instead, he had mediated to pass the time. Since he had been alone, he did it while sitting in the exact center of their massive bed. He had spent the night alone, listening to the oppressive silence of an empty house, and revisiting the argument he and Jim had had the night before. Spock can still smell the alcohol his husband spilled onto the carpet as Jim accused him and berated him, his heritage and strength of will turned against him into character deficits. 

Spock rises and washes, but it is perfunctory. Something about the quality of the light and the silence of the room spurs him to dress before the blue light turns to rose and gold. He understands that the wish is illogical, but still he knows it to be true. The blue light is stark, and he cannot stand to see their marriage bed bathed in the colors of love this morning. His dress uniform is there, hanging in the wardrobe, pressed and neat. Jim's uniform is not here, and he suspects it was not laundered before he put it on. Leonard would never have let Jim leave the house in such a state, but he would have appreciated the emotion behind arriving at this particular function as a rumpled, weeping, mess. Spock suspects that though he, himself, would be found wanting in that regard, Leonard would have forgiven him. Possibly, with a kiss, if he could spare it while comforting Jim. 

He makes it out of the bedroom in time, but must still face the rosy light in the kitchen, and it is here that Spock begins to suspect he will not make it through the day without an emotional outburst. McCoy’s assertion that the kitchen was the ‘heart of the home’ led to him taking over here, as Jim was willing to live in a home but not create it, and Spock’s tastes were Spartan. Leonard had spent years choosing every single item in this room, truly creating the warm center he had declared it to be. Pictures cover the walls of the kitchen and the dining area attached, and it is here that he has placed the large framed portrait of them all at the Japanese Tea Gardens. All three stand there forever beneath a cherry blossom tree, arms linked with a beaming Leonard in the middle. 

Unwilling to be late, Spock is forced to skip breakfast due to the length of time he spends looking at it.  


Starfleet has spared no expense. The celebration of Admiral McCoy’s life has taken over the Academy, and there are several guest speakers. His contribution to medicine in a laboratory setting and his ingenuity in emergencies are significant; Spock is gratified to see that they will be properly celebrated. He attempts to find Jim, but campus is large, and he suspects Jim is both still drinking, and avoiding him until after the speech. 

Many visiting dignitaries demand his time and attention; Spock wishes they would simply send messages of consolation. Those he can dispose of easily, but the psychic toll it takes not to embarrass Starfleet is significant. He has no idea how much so until Nyota deftly extricates him from a knot of Ambassadors, steering him into a blissfully empty stairwell behind the stage. Privately, he has always been surprised at her ability to get him to move where she desires without so much as a touch. She does not stay, but the look in her eyes steadies him. Spock sits on a step and attempts to center himself before he takes his seat to watch Jim speak.  


Admiral Kirk takes the podium. Reserved for dignitaries, the first ten rows are filled to capacity. Crowded behind them is the entirety of Starfleet academy, both current students and alumni on leave. He scrubs his hand over his face, and plasters on a smile while he looks at his notes. He isn’t drunk, but he’s not far from it. 

“Leonard McCoy,” He begins, and his voice is husky. He clears it, and stands staring at the notes long enough for people to begin muttering to themselves. “Admiral McCoy was a good…good…friend.” He stumbles over the last word, clenching a fist and crumpling his notes. “You certainly know the stories he would tell about us all in class…” he leaves that there, allowing everyone to indulge in a fond chuckle. Bones was infamous for taking up half his classes with the tales of the Enterprise, and the exploits of their crew. 

“What he would never tell to his students was that he was the conscience and heart of the crew of that famous ship. There will never be another man like him, but for those of you who were lucky enough to learn from him…” he trails off again, struggling to contain the tears that will no longer be denied. Admiral Kirk turns from the podium as if he is going to leave, but stops himself. “To you lucky few: make him proud.” 

Admiral Kirk leaves the stage with as much dignity as he can muster. The keen eyed note his husband quickly and quietly leave his seat and slip into the exit leading backstage in order to follow him. Through the rest of the ceremony, neither return.  


The paths in the Tea Garden have been the same for as long as Jim can remember. When he was a freshman he walked them with whatever new woman he was seeing that week, and he walked them alone when he needed to think and clear his head. There was a time when he used to collect reproductions of photographs taken here that were centuries old...people long dead and forgotten kissing by the river, a woman laughing in a shower of cherry blossoms. When they had finally come home with their whales, he brought Spock and Leonard both here so everything he loved that was still intact in this world could be in one place. He’d asked a passing student to take the picture that now hangs in their kitchen: the three of them, all of them laughing with the shiny new promise of a life together. Well, he and Bones were laughing anyway. 

Once they all confirmed their ‘retirement’ and were all finally the same rank, Kirk and Spock were ‘officially allowed’ to have a relationship. So, after weeks of Jim and Leonard arguing, Spock and Kirk married in a small ceremony. Bones was Kirk’s best man. They took the public wedding photographs that he and Spock had posed for here; the beautiful trees and flowers of the garden are a romantic setting, but Jim hated that photo. Over Leonard’s strenuous objections Jim had forbidden it to be put in a place of honor on their walls, relegating it to the back of a closet. 

It hurts to be here now, without him. The speech hurt; its foundations were a lie. 

Jim turns to look at Spock, who is keeping pace beside him placidly. Spock shakes his head. 

“Jim…” his voice is gentle but firm. “It was what he asked for.” 

Jim grinds his jaw. “He could have been recognized as our husband. The law…” 

“The law provides for it only in certain cases, and as neither you nor McCoy were members of a long defunct religious sect, nor I a Denobulan, the law remains stubbornly orthodox about such matters. Even on Vulcan, it would have been subject to much scrutiny.” 

“Leonard,” Jim grinds out. “Right, now, can’t you call him…” 

“ _Leonard_ ,” Spock interrupts. His voice is still gentle, but his hand on Jim’s arm is steel as it steers him forward, “Asked for this arrangement specifically. If you will recall, he gave you the same speech when you fought over it then. He did not want to be the sticking point that kept you from becoming the Dean of Starfleet Academy, and it kept things civil with his ex-wife. He was happy. Jim, look at me. _He was happy._ ” 

Two students with black armbands walk by, and Jim turns away from them sharply. 

_Leonard’s daughter had been odd on the phone. “Have her ready when I come, I can’t stay.” He didn’t know what he’d done to upset her, but now he can see the real issue: She had her mother with her. Leonard’s ex-wife came out of their transport ready to fight already. She was cutting and bitter. Freaks, she called them. Parasites. Spock especially, for ‘corrupting him with your Vulcan sorcery’. She meant his Katra; it was a sore point between the three, and she knew it, pressing on the fracture whenever she got the chance. Leonard tried to bundle his granddaughter into the transport quickly while his daughter tried to coax her mother back into the car._

Jim isn’t fast enough, and the students approach him. He tries to smile, but his body feels too heavy, and he can only stare at them silently. Spock smoothly steps up to the task, accepting the condolences from both cadets with grace. 

They start walking again, but the gardens have become unrecognizable to him now. He allows Spock to steer him, two fingers resting gently on his wrist. 

_Once they are gone, the silence is unbearable. Spock looks at his hands, rendered as speechless as he always is when this comes up._

_“Bones,” Jim starts tentatively, but Lenoard almost growls at him._

_“Jim. Spock. How many times do I have to explain myself before you can accept that I have some damn autonomy here. I love you both, of my own free will. Having Spock in my noggin didn’t turn me into a puppet. My ex-wife is a crazy, lost woman. End of story.” He slammed the door in their faces. Jim laughed and followed him, but Spock stays behind staring at his hands._

They end up in a small gazebo, built a century previous, and now covered with enough vines and flowers that it is nearly invisible to the main pathway. Not many who come here even know it exists. Jim showed it to Spock on their first shore leave back home, decades ago. They spent a few breathless hours wrapped around one another here then, and every chance they had since. 

Jim sits on a bench and looks up at his husband with red eyes. He reaches out with one hand and then drops it again, his gaze falling into his lap. 

Spock sits beside him with a gentle sigh. “I had hoped you knew that I loved him. For a time I worried that the transfer of my Katra had forever tainted both our hearts, and that it would fade over time.” 

Jim lets out an explosion of breath and opens his mouth, only to find Spock’s long elegant finger resting over his lips. “Quiet. Eventually I began to learn that even though it was true that some feelings and memories transferred between us, our love was genuine. His love for you was genuine. I grieve, Jim. Let me in, so we may bear this burden together.” 

Jim takes Spock’s face in between his hands and kisses him roughly. 

“I am so sorry, Spock.” His voice is rough and his body strains a little with repressed emotion. “You didn’t deserve the things I said. I know you loved Leonard, I was just so _angry_.I should have been with you last night.” 

Spock nods, tracing the line of Kirk’s lips with a fingertip. “Yes, you should have. You are here now. T'hy'la. Jim. Stay with me. You grieve with all of your being, and I would not change this, but when you sequester yourself from the world, keep me within your bounds.” 

Leaning forward, he delicately licks Kirk’s bottom lip, finding satisfaction in the darkening of his husband’s eyes. 

Kirk wraps one arm around Spock, leaning him back into the bench seat, murmuring, “The rest of the world can burn itself out. I have all I need here.” 

In an hour or two, they will have to leave their sanctuary, and the magnitude of their loss will return, so Spock allows Kirk to strip him of his composure, kiss by kiss. When they rebuild the walls to keep them from the rest of the world, it will be around them both.


End file.
